February 5, 2010
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BFF
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A friend said to me, "You know it's always a bad idea when a parent tries to be friend to their kid, instead of being a parent." Sure, right, don't go buy them beer and talk about what a slob their dad is. But let's face it, when your kids are who you are with 90% of the time how can they not become your best friend? Your BFF. There is nothing wrong with that, right?
That was very cute. But I have to agree. My daughter is my BFF. Especially when I was a single mom, we were so tight and I loved it. That's not to say I wouldn't whoop her butt if she needed it, but I feel like I can talk to her about anything. I don't, God NO! She's only 8 years old, I don't want to scar her for life, but it's nice to feel that way.
I'm remarried now and pregnant again and I wonder if I will feel the same way about this new baby. Hard to imagine for me. Guess we'll have to wait and see.
@BeingSuper
Absolutely precious! I just finished watching this over and over.
The most adorable vlog out there. I've got to link this out to my friends, who are long past this sweet baby stage.
You would really enjoy this book I just finished, Daphne: "Surrendering to Motherhood." It's fantastically written, about how we can fight this mothering gig all the way or just decide to surrender and drink in all it's sweetness.
Kind of like the charming college bartender/boyfriend.
Anyhow, that's how I read the book
I've missed your blogging so much, but I"m back: had to take a second job while my husband was laid off for one year to.the.day.
Now, back to just my evening/weekend hours and my days are mine. It was tough for a while, but we didn't lose the house. But I was working FT in the week, then nights and weekends. It was tough..but I can't wait to stay in all day and just catch up on you.
You're right Daphne, it's hard not to become "friends" with your kid (s) when you spend most of the day with them…as long as they don't know it…..LOL Let me explain, I wouldn't tell me daughter, "Ohhh you are my best friend, Gabriella!" b/c 1. I don't think she needs to know that, and 2. When she gets to be a teenager she'll tell me, "Mom, you're pathetic! Please get some friends of your own and leave me and MY friends alone!"
I really don't want to hear those words in the future and I don't want to become THAT mom that at 50 is wearing Hannah Montana t-shirts and neon leggins…granted that Hannah Montana would still be arounf (which I highly doubt) but you know what I mean.
My husband and his mom and very good friends and they talk about everything (I mean EVERYTHING) now, but I don't think he ever thought that her mom wasn't his "mom" you know? I think what's most important is letting your kids know that they can trust you and come to you for anything (judgement-free) but still knowing the fact that we are their parents and we deserve respect.
Call me old school! LOL
LOVE when Rex crawls over to the camera and then looks up at your cameraman!!! What a cutie!
Yes, it's a fine line between being a pal and being a parent. I think both are doable, as long as one doesn't go too far in the friend direction. Then the parent role tends to backfire. And when they're little and we're home with them all day? They are our BFFs by default.
Love your stuff, Daphne. Always funny.
Very funny, Daph, and oh so true. Gets better as they get bigger though, thank god.
BFF by default, exactly! Yes, Frances, the trying to hard lady.
All great comments, but I have to scream for a second ALEXANDRA WELCOME BACK. I have so missed you. I am so glad you didn't lose your house. Congrats!!! I was kind of worried about you. So was my mom she was afraid I had said something to offend you. I said, I don't think so mom, people can't come to my site all the time, they have lives.
But, I was hoping to hear from you again. Best wishes!
Ha ha! "Do you wanna go get a drink?" As he gazes off. HILARIOUS!
Yup, my three kids are among my best friends. Too bad they have to go and grow up on me. What will I do when my girls don't WANT to hang with their Mom?!
Maybe I'm alone in this…but NO, I do not think my kids should be my best friends. That is WAY too much pressure for a kid, even if you don't tell them!
I know the dynamics of the relationship can change as your children become adults (my relationship with my mother changed)…but I see too many "friend" parents that have lost control of their kids, b/c they are no longer an authority figure to their kids! Maybe there are exceptions…I couldn't stand my mother. We both have strong personalities and big opinions…and that only made us fight while I lived at home. Once I moved out, once I had my OWN children…it was very different. She was no longer "large and in charge"…and I could leave her house when I could tell we weren't going to see eye to eye on something.
I do see some parents and kids that get along together, even as teens, but I still see the same problems I had with my parents…and I also see a sense of entitlement in the kids like, "Well, I can do this b/c my mom is my friend…I don't have to act like a kid."
yeah, well, that's sort of what I'm making fun of. I'm a stand in for the innappropriate mother, yet it's hard when that is who you see all the time. hence moms who are lonely…which is most of them.
Im a control freak so I can never cross the friend line. Im to afraid of what could happen when they are older.
It was hard to stay focused on your humor during this one due to those cute baby close ups..