Here’s a mommy dilemma: when do you crash your kid’s sweet imagination, and when do you let it ride? Vivien has really enjoyed gardening with her dad. We have tomatoes, strawberries, herbs and lemons. When we planted the lemon trees, it gave Viv an idea of another kind of tree she wants.
I’m thinking of how to rig it…
Parents, listen up! It’s never too early to plan for our children’s future, right? We try to put away some dough for rainy days, college, shoes… So while we’re planning their future careers, shouldn’t we also consider the future of our country? In this video, I lay out my plan for young girls to take over the world – I mean, the USA. Let’s start there.
Ah, the joys of parental abuse. Being climbed on, kicked in the shins, and my personal favorite having nails dug into my face is all normal stuff. But, what if it happens when you can’t discipline? Whatta you do?
The bottom line is a handheld cell phone is the only danger motorists face.
One of the things forced to go when you become a parent is your potty mouth. Aren’t you more aware of other people’s foul mouth?
Walking along the street or TV where the “F” word is flying. Sometimes I think, “hey, settle down.” Although, when I am in the company of adults only, I like to take the censor off my mouth and go gutter.
The kids really do pick up what you say, I found out the hard way.
Here’s that age-old question: “How have you accidentally hurt your child?”
It seems crazy, right? Any of us would jump in front of a bus to save our kid, but there are some bumps that we accidently inflict. Don’t call child protective services! Nothing of the lit cigarette variety, but here is my confession. I hope I’m not the only one…
This is an issue that really intrigues me. I was raised by a true “cool mom” who, if I asked, would let me skip school, thought a B grade was great, and when we got depressed and wanted to lie down for a few months, was like “Sure, I understand.” I think because she has worked with so many troubled youths, the fact that my sisters and I showered and didn’t try to set the house on fire made her feel we were fine.
But once I forged my way into the real world, I saw that a thicker skin and good penmanship – for starters – may have helped me along the way. I think a lot about how to be loving to Vivien and make her feel solid in herself, while also toughening her up for the real world.
One way I do this is I RARELY interfere if Oliver is teasing her. I like her getting feisty and either not getting her way with him and learning from that, or sticking up for herself and learning from that. I take cues from prominent people, especially women, since I believe we have our own unique hurdles to jump. I remember what Nancy Pelosi said when asked how a woman get’s to be the Speaker of the House. She said, “I highly reccomend having 5 older brothers.” Every time I hear Vivien wail “Oli-ver!!!” I think of that and stay put.
Or an interview with Hillary Clinton where she said if she got an A, her father would say, “That must be an easy school.” Or Condi Rice’s parents making sure she practice that piano. Or Obama’s mom waking him up early before he went to school in Indonesia so that he could do correspondence courses she had sent away for him. Obviously a lot was expected of them, and losers they ain’t.
So this is one of those moments when I didn’t want Vivien to give up.
Once again, I visit the big gun in my arsenal – my mom. This is such a big issue for parents: how do you realistically protect your daughter from being too sexy? Is there an assualt from our media – I think so – or is this just our perception, since we are no longer the ones tramping around town? Morency, my mom, weighs in.
Once again, when I need to tackle the hard topics I turn to my hero/guru: my mom. She was the director of a nursery school and for more than 30 years has run a small private school. I wanted to know her take on homework.
Obviously this isn’t yet an issue with Vivien, but the public elementary school near us that she will probably go to scares me a bit. It’s 60% Korean, and academically they ain’t kidding around! I see the little ones with wheelie bags. And with No Child Left Behind, arts have been thrown in the garbage.
Oliver has a fair bit of homework, which I used to help with a bit. But starting around 6th grade, when I would ask, “Do you need some help?” he would give me a look like, “Do you really think you can be of any help?” Frankly, I really couldn’t.
Let’s face it, the shows our kids watch permeate our souls! Lately, Vivien’s number ones have changed to Max & Ruby (big, big fave) and The Upside Down Show. My sister Cecily says, “You always like what your bunny likes.” But not always… hence this vlog about the Berenstain Bears. (Also Wow! Wow! Wubbzy!… I started to avoid that one. Too fast.)
Are there some that you like and some that just bug?
From time to time, it’s good to hear from a mother wiser than myself – my mom!
My mom, Morency, not only raised three girls but has run her own small private school for close to 30 years. She deals with kids who would otherwise fall through the cracks, so I think she has a lot of insight. Since I am a step mom, I wanted to ask her about the step parents she has known through the years.
Anyone who has had that job knows it can be a little dicey to navigate. And I am lucky. I never had the ABC Afterschool Special moment I thought I would have, a step child running down the hall, screaming, “Leave me alone, you aren’t my mother!” as they slam the door to their room.