Momversation: Is An Emotional Affair Cheating?

I’m starting to realize I’m the tart mom in the Momversation line up.  I’m the one bringing up issues related to sex.  Well, that’s how we all became mom’s right? (mom’s who adopted or had IV, be quiet, I’m on a roll). I mean just because we became mom’s doesn’t mean it never crosses our minds, right.

Oops, yeah I forgot, I have yapped about my diminished libido.  Oh well.

This Momversation launches from an essay in Redbook about having an emotional affair.  I think this would be a much easier affair to slide into.  When you cross the line would be hard to know.  As opposed to checking into the Ramada as “Mr and Mrs Jones” and taking your clothes which is a clear tip off… a line has been crossed.

Have you ever been up late writing messages on Facebook to some old college flame?

Do you look forward to emails from a male friend and rush to answer them?

Or is your emotional affair with the latest issues of Sunset Magazine ? ( that would be me)

Charity to Charity

How many times have you gotten a request from a friend to support them in a run/walk/swim/trip to a developing nation? I just gave some money to one request as I periodically do, but I’d love to blow most of them off.  Oh, wait, that’s right, I do. 

Lincoln's Racing Santas
Creative Commons License photo credit: Lincolnian

Number one, there’s so many of them.

Number two, it takes a certain amount – sometimes quite bit – of the money raised to actually finance the triathlon or what have you. If the person wants to raise money for a cause, I would be more apt to give if it was, “Hey, I decided this year I want to raise money for (fill in the blank disease or cause). I’ve kicked in a grand, would you please give what you can?” I think too often, while part of their heart is in the right place, part of it also wants to see if they can do a 10k. I don’t ask anyone to pay for my training. If I had any.

My feeling on this is also colored because years ago, a boyfriend was going on an AIDS ride in Alaska. He loved to work out, so he liked the physical challenge. He had to raise about $3,600, at least half of which paid for the ride. It was a drag while he was raising it, and he would be gone for two weeks. I didn’t want him to go. I said, “Raise a grand, give it to AIDS, and stay at home.” He went anyway and came home talking about what an “incredible experience it was.” I couldn’t share his enthusiasm, much as I guess Jennifer Aniston didn’t share Brad Pitt’s excitement for his film “Mr. and Mrs. Smith.” Weeks later, he finally confessed what I had an inkling of: he’d had oral sex with a female masseuse from New York in a tent in Alaska. What charitable people!