And The Winner Is…

…No, not the Emmy Awards. I couldn’t watch more than 20 minutes – just wanted to see the clothes.

I’m talking about the winner of the 3rd Birthday Present award. Out of all of the super cool gifts Vivien got this week, so far the one that has made her the most gaga is this Music Box. It arrived this morning from her friend Mercy (via her mom, of course).  She was absolutely mesmerized by this good, old-fashion keepsake. Vivien insisted on taking it to school where many of the kids were also enchanted. It plays “Beautiful Dreamer” and is from Enchantmints.

Music Box

She also really liked the “decorate your own crown” from her friend Charlie as well as playing with the t-ball set with dad last night. But today, the music box has been kept near.

Can’t blame her. I still have my little log cabin music box I was given at about 5 or 6. I still get a kick out of it when I open it and it plays “Edelweiss.”

Weddings Ruin Friendships

Be aware, you are about to see a radical view of weddings here. I had my legal wedding in my living room, with 10 people. Fourteen months later, I had the big blowout variety, with 120 people. So I think that’s what started me thinking of this. That, and my own cynical attitude at others’ weddings. Tell me what you think.

Those G– D— Party Favors!

Vivien’s third birthday was Sunday. Naturally, what started as a small gathering in our backyard grew larger and similar in price to the Fed bailout. Invite a few kids, with parents and my relatives, and it was about 30-plus folks. That’s okay: I handled the food (ordered from my husband’s restaurant, naturally), got balloons, rented a couple of tables for outside, had a kid-entertainer who took Viv’s sour morning mood and made her harmonica-playing happy – literally. And I ordered a yummy cake (sidebar: from the most inept bakery, with the worst customer service – Sweet Lady Jane on Melrose in LA). But here’s what got my panties in a bundle: The party favors!

Daphne and Viv at School

I delayed getting them until the afternoon before the party, so I was overwhelmed at the task. And I found one site that said I should “make the favors memorable.” Oh, for the love of Pete!

It used to be that favors were the same junk you found in piñatas: A little plastic whistle, some candy. Now they are real toys. At a party a few months ago, one mom gave each kid three toys in a bag – I’m talking good Melissa & Doug toys. I think the biggest reason to have favors is to help parents get the screaming kid out the door. “I know you don’t want to leave, but here is a present for you, if you do!”

I called my mom and asked her what to do. She said, “I can’t help you. When you were a kid we didn’t have to give favors.” True, the favor at my kiddie parties was a small paper cup of jellybeans that the kids munched on before cake. In a couple of years, it won’t just be favors. Soon, at kiddie parties they will have gifting suites.

And another thing: At the party, three separate kids came up to me and asked, “Where is the piñata?” I sai, honestly, “No piñata: I don’t like them.” Little kids waving around a big stick and finally some dad has to step in to whack it? The whole thing stresses me out.

My Big News

No, I’m not McCain’s running mate. No, I’m not 17, nor have I moved to Alaska. But, happily, I am…

PREGNANT!! We are thrilled. We have been waiting to talk about it until we got past the point that we lost our pregnancy last year. That was at 14 and half weeks, and after the CVS had said the baby was healthy and a girl. I am now 16 weeks, the CVS is showing all good and it’s a boy! I pray, affirm, chant, whatever works, that this baby will be born healthy.

Mark and I feel like we can finally be happy about it. A few weeks ago when I asked Mark about names, he looked dire and said he wouldn’t discuss it until after 15 weeks. I completely understood. I didn’t want to get my hopes up, either. Although now, even though we are not out of the woods, our hopes are way up.

My stepchildren have been really cool. My stepdaughter, in particular, expressed excitement, which makes me feel good, since I still half-expect to be rejected by them (due to my own anxieties, not because of anything they say or do). Vivien isn’t totally connected to what is happening, but she has said a few times, “I’m going to have a baby brother!”

I’m trying to relax my anxiety. I’m thinking seriously of seeing a therapist, since every time I have a check-up, I start crying because I’m so afraid that once again the ultrasound will show that there is no heartbeat. I have to get a grip. And covet this joy.

Divorcing Friends

Don’t get me wrong, some people should get divorced. When my dad moved out, my sadness was tinged with a great relief! But my knee-jerk reaction to hearing that people with children are divorcing is “DON’T!” I can get kind of Dr. Laura about it. So in this video are a couple of issues in regards to divorce that have hit me recently.

Why I Love Advertising Part 2

I kind of rush the beginning of this vlog, so if you didn’t see my previous video about this (Why I Love Advertising), let me explain. I always wanted to buy Tarn-X when I was a kid, but my mom said it was a waste of money. More than thirty years later (“more than” being the key phrase), I finally bought some. When I mentioned I didn’t test the Tarn-X, several (um, two) people asked me to do so. So, here is my test: will Tarn-X take off the tarnish on my silver like the commercials from the 1970s?

The Palin Saga: An Attack On Motherhood?

Well, it’s hard not to snicker and find humor. The governor looks like Tina Fey, so the sketch could write itself.  Kind of a Clampett’s comes to the White House and since Palin is a hunter the family can even have a shot gun wedding. Crabmommy had a good post on the comedic side of “choice.”

It’s so ugly and sexist what is going on?  My husband said, “the Democrats have to be careful or it will seem like they are attacking motherhood.” Obama’s statement almost made me cry when he said that families should be off limits and that this was a nonissue.  “My mom had me when she was 18,” Obama said. Yeah, and look how badly he turned out.

Other pundits, talk show host, columnists have been very mean about Palin and her family. If I hear one more woman say that she shouldn’t be vice president because she can’t take care of her kids I will scream. NO ONE says that about a male politician. Say she shouldn’t be VP because she is anti choice, thinks global warming isn’t man made, has no foreign policy experience, in other words issue that are relevant to the work, but don’t piss on working moms. The only “oh my ” to come out of this is that Palin opposed sexual education in schools.

I do think they shouldn’t pick on the kid, or hold Palin to a higher standard of parenting then a male politician. But, between Jamie Lynn Spears and this soap opera in Alaska I fear an over glorification of teen pregnancies will be the aftermath. Teen mothers and their children have a brutal economic hole to dig themselves out of.

This from G-CAPP:
“The poverty rate for children born to teen mothers who have never married and have not graduated from high school is 78 percent.”

Now, I’m all for sex-ed. I was raised in a school where in 4th grade we were practicing putting a diaphragm in a plastic vagina as part of our sex-ed. I think condoms should be passed on street corners. I would take to the streets to protect Roe V. Wade, or if outlawed help ferry women to a country that would perform a DNC (not the convention, the procedure). If this Christian family believes that they can handle whatever life brings them, Down Syndrome or a teen mom, then leave this family alone.

Home Wreckers

Okay, don’t worry just because this is my second vlog in a row talking about issues in marriage don’t think it’s a cry for help! This comes out of the general knowledge that being a mom doesn’t always make me the sweetest partner.

But it also stems from me hearing friends and others, talk about faulty reasoning behind deciding to have a child.