Okay, hmm… I think this is an interesting Momversation. But in the editing room it became more about guns specifically than I had intended it to be. I think Rebecca and Alice all have great commentary in this.
My larger point was more about reinforcing my daughters “tomboy” (for lack of a better word) or fiesty side. Much the same way that I didn’t shut her down when over dinner she told her dad to “x-it, that means be quiet” when she was telling a story. I think girls become woman who silence themselves and defer. Why do you think there are so few woman in talk radio?
And with this super hero/fantasy play, I think kids are trying on different hats, and I am not going to declaw her when she will need them out in the world.
And to squash these impulses is against this little thing called human nature.
Since we are social creatures, I think it’s in parents’ best interest to support their child’s friendships. When we had to move, I rarely looked at a house that wasn’t in “Avery striking distance” as I called it. That is Viv’s best neighborhood buddy, who we use to be a stone’s throw from. We are a long walk or a short drive now, and happily Avery’s mom and I are making that friendship work.
Of course 8 to 10 years from now, Vivien will much prefer to spend as much time away from me and with her friends as possible. That will be hard, but I am bracing for it. But what if her friends aren’t real?
Check out this article about imaginary play in the New York Times.
Here’s a mommy dilemma: when do you crash your kid’s sweet imagination, and when do you let it ride? Vivien has really enjoyed gardening with her dad. We have tomatoes, strawberries, herbs and lemons. When we planted the lemon trees, it gave Viv an idea of another kind of tree she wants.