I Never Developed My Wedding Pictures

We just passed my wedding anniversary so this is a timely video.

I’ve been married twice, but to the same man.

First we had a “shot gun” wedding as I was 6 months pregnant.  A really lovely ceremony in our living room. We threw it together in 5 days.  Mark’s friend who is a judge married us and we had about 10 people there. Family and two friends.  His restaurant catered a brunch.  In the afternoon we drove down to Palm Springs for our honeymoon. It was Perfect.  My mom said it was one of the best weddings she had ever been to.  I think the only one she liked more was my brother’s which had a total of 5 people attending. We had lovely photos and I put them in a book as I waited for my daughter to be born.

But, I couldn’t leave well enough alone.  When Vivien was a year we had a big, blow out 3 day long wedding redux in Palm Springs.  There was the “Daphne Open” golf tourney.  The “Mark croquet” morning.  You know the kind of thing one can do BEFORE a certain notable Ponzi scheme was found out.

I won’t kid you too, I looked good at the 2nd wedding.  I had lost my baby weight and then some.  The desert color made every one look like a movie star.  So, Why don’t I have ONE photo framed or in a book?


Birth, the Old-Fashioned Way

Sometimes it’s good to see something like this to remind us of 1) how good we have it and 2) how f–ing hard labor can be. Check out this piece from Reuters about birthing in a primitive place. No lights, no anesthesia, lack of sterilization, and the woman giving birth had lost the baby’s father months before. The picture of her enduring all alone is breathtaking.

I went through a C-section (Vivien was breech and late), no walk in the park. But when I miscarried I went into labor. I would not have thought at 15 weeks it would have been as UNRELENTINGLY painful as it was. But after begging them in the ER, I was eventually given something for the pain which helped a bit ’til it was over. I was so GRATEFUL for the care I got.

I know some women, like my mother, opt for natural childbirth. I thought I would be that person, but my experience changed that. I cannot believe the pain women go through. And the women in this story don’t have an option. It’s not a planned, at-home, water birth by affluent Americans. It’s all there is. Just something to think about.