I took Vivien with me to the Fashion Team today. It was great. She needed some mom time since I think my hospital stay pushed her away. She modeled (will air this Sunday at 7 p.m. and then repeated Monday at 7 p.m. on the TV Guide Channel). She hung out for a couple of hours with another kid whose mom is our supervising producer. She was a gem. Mark was minding Rex.

Rex had a very hard time settling last night, but then did well. And while sleepy, he has been much more himself today, nursing normally. I’ve become a hand-washing Nazi. I’m too freaked not to.  My sister-in-law and mother-in-law were here in the evening along with Dolly, a woman who helps me in the evenings when Mark is gone and without whom I would probably become a heavy drinker. My friend Arlene came over with her two girls who play with Vivien. With this full house, I said to Arlene, “Let’s get out of here. I need a drink.” A mile away is my husband’s restaurant, and I figured we were good for an hour. We sat at the bar and drank a dry, French white wine and ate a lamb sandwich. My sister’s friend Mimi and her husband Guy walked in. I had just finished telling Arlene everything. Mimi had emailed while Rex was in the hospital. As I was talking about it, I suddenly thought, “I can’t talk about it anymore.” I recounted calling my brother-in-law from the ER to ask them to look after Vivien, and when I got the part about Kevin saying, “What can we do to help?”  I finally started to cry. I hadn’t cried during the whole thing. The wine, the sympathetic faces, the relief.

I was just looking at Rex as he slept and prayed we won’t ever have to go back there. My heart soooo goes out to parents who have sick kids. Seriously sick kids. Words fail me to express what that is like for them.

I think I’m going to be more ginger with him for quite a while.