Momversation: Funny Wedding Stories

This is a fun one. Okay, so many anecdotes, so little time. So here are a few that didn’t make the cut.

At my wedding (and I mean the big, non-legal one, not the small, legal one) I was crazed doing the tables at the last minute because so many people changed their RSVP at the last minute, or called the day before and said, “We are coming, and where should we stay?”  (um, I did list hotels with special rates on the invite, but never mind) So my best gay friend and I were creating the place settings about 2 hours before the service. Some tables made more sense than others. Oh well.

I forgot to set aside time to get dressed and to have someone help dress me. My guy friend Whitney had been recruited to be our videographer. He was following me around for the video, and I yelled at him to put down the camera and help me get dressed. My friend Teresa was my hair and makeup woman who thankfully works fast and very well. I sat down, and she started creating these curls.

“I don’t know if I want these curls.”

“Tough, it’s all we have time for.”  And they looked great.

I spent a lot of time planning our music. The family members and Mark walked out to “Everlong” by the Foo Fighters. I walked down to Johnny Hartmen’s, “My One and Only Love.”

When we were about to take our vows Vivien (who had just turned 1) started crying. I had to stop the ceremony and ask her nanny to take her out since I knew it upset her to be with mom, but not be in her arms. I had been trying to comfort her before the ceremony, and somewhere there are pictures of me all bedecked, ready to walk, but I had to sit down in the catering directors office and nurse her.

Our recessional was Van Halen’s, “Jump.” A song I have long loved and loved the hidden message of taking a leap into marriage. So, my mother (who performed the ceremony) said the last words, we kissed, staredt to walk down to the famous first few bars on the key board and then screeeeeeeeeeech. The music stopped.  A laugh from the crowd and then, oh well, let’s keep going. Moment lost.

Ended up someone had set their drink down on the CD player. Luckily, I brought with me because once I was in Palm Springs, it ended up the venue didn’t have one. The coordinator dried it out during the cocktail hour with a blow dryer so we had it for later.

Over all though, my weddings… both… were great. The first day people came, we had the Daphne Open golf tourney. The morning of the wedding we had the Mark Croquet games. We had a great band, wonderful toasts by my stepdaughter, my sisters, my sister-in-law and my friend Heather, who is the reason I met Mark. And by having the wedding out of town only those who REALLY wanted to be there and were fun came. And on the final day, there was a pool party at my friend Jeff’s house, which was a blast.

So, glad we did all that when we had the money… and so did others.

What were your hiccups in your day of bliss?

I Never Developed My Wedding Pictures

We just passed my wedding anniversary so this is a timely video.

I’ve been married twice, but to the same man.

First we had a “shot gun” wedding as I was 6 months pregnant.  A really lovely ceremony in our living room. We threw it together in 5 days.  Mark’s friend who is a judge married us and we had about 10 people there. Family and two friends.  His restaurant catered a brunch.  In the afternoon we drove down to Palm Springs for our honeymoon. It was Perfect.  My mom said it was one of the best weddings she had ever been to.  I think the only one she liked more was my brother’s which had a total of 5 people attending. We had lovely photos and I put them in a book as I waited for my daughter to be born.

But, I couldn’t leave well enough alone.  When Vivien was a year we had a big, blow out 3 day long wedding redux in Palm Springs.  There was the “Daphne Open” golf tourney.  The “Mark croquet” morning.  You know the kind of thing one can do BEFORE a certain notable Ponzi scheme was found out.

I won’t kid you too, I looked good at the 2nd wedding.  I had lost my baby weight and then some.  The desert color made every one look like a movie star.  So, Why don’t I have ONE photo framed or in a book?

hmmmmm

Weddings Ruin Friendships

Be aware, you are about to see a radical view of weddings here. I had my legal wedding in my living room, with 10 people. Fourteen months later, I had the big blowout variety, with 120 people. So I think that’s what started me thinking of this. That, and my own cynical attitude at others’ weddings. Tell me what you think.