I love summer! I love not racing to school. I love not saying “have you done your homework”, not packing lunch every day and dodging the dog pooh that lines the walkway near my daughter’s school.
I love getting to see my kids more. Vivien consented to sit for a brief interview. It’s been a while. In journalism we’d call this a “get”. The one hitch is that Rex insisted on helping with production. Oh, help he did
Well, to video. The schools have stolen my best talent. But, good news, Summer is upon us. Vivien is almost out, but my former sidekick my son is done with his first full year of fulltime preschool and he is ready to make time for his moms silly practice of making online videos.
Really, he couldn’t wait! Really?
I look like Chesty McChesty here
A cool mom could go to Europe without her kids and be fine. A cool mom would have some cute little attractive hair cut as she occasionally skyped with her kids while she lost herself in her trip knowing the kids were taken care off. She’d have a cute outfit like Julie Christy in “Darling”, not the same flip flops and ratted up hair all week.
" Hello, are my children alright?"
I had moments, but overall Failed this coolmom test.
Mark and I were in Spain for 8 days. Long story short. I love Spain. 
It makes America look like a dirty, decaying bag of trash. I had great food and wine. 
I met wonderful people. I had moments when the pain of being away from kids felt physical.
As I landed at LAX I texted my mom . ”We’ve landed”
“I know” She wrote. She had been following me on flight tracker. ”Now, never do this again.”
I promise mom, I won’t.
More on my trip this week.
While I’m on my trip I have enlisted some of my favorite women to help me fill this space. Because of my involvement in the Mayor’s race I have felt more connected to my city and wanted to pick bloggers who also feel that connection. Today it is Monique Ruffin. I met Monique at a shoot for Mom.me sometime in ’12 and I was instantly drawn to her. A charismatic single mom I thought, “she has it”. She writes for the Huffington Post and is passionate about her dedication to doing good and raising her son who has special needs. If we were in pre school together I would pull my mat next to hers at nap time. The more you know of her you too will want to be her friend.
Last Tuesday, May 21, 2013, Eric Garcetti was elected mayor Los Angeles, the second largest city in the U.S. It was a hard-fought race for both candidates, and by the end of the campaign, many local news outlets were saying it was too close to predict a winner. In my personal circle, which includes many politically savvy folks, the message was to keep campaigning to the very end in order to ensure a Garcetti victory.
As fate would have it, I was interviewed by Seema Mehta, a reporter for the Los Angeles Times, just three days before the election. At the time, I was at the park pushing my six-year-old son on the swing. Sometimes the stars just align, and things happen more fortuitously for you than if you had tried to organize them yourself. I have been a political junky all my life, and I was heavily involved in both the 2008 and 2012 presidential elections. I even wrote a book, titled Open Your American Heart: From Personal Responsibility to Collective Accountability, hoping to help citizens understand the personal nature of politics and how valuable we each are to the process. And so when Mehta approached me with a tape recorder and asked who I was supporting for mayor, I was ready to talk. What a fabulous opportunity!
I was born and raised in Los Angeles, and I have lived and worked in many different areas of the city. I love it here. One of my most favorite things about L.A. is our farmers’ markets. I do most of my shopping at the farmers’ markets because I understand the value of circulating dollars to local farmers and how the practice impacts the community and the environment. And because I have a young son, I care deeply about the welfare of the city’s parks, and of the public schools on which he and I rely. My son has Down syndrome, so when it comes to education, I’m all too aware of the benefits of a well-funded system. Maintaining solid programs that benefit all children will prove to be a mighty effort for mayor-elect Garcetti, as it has been for mayors in the past. It is my belief that this mayor has what it takes, the heart and the wisdom, to make a difference.
The day after Mehta interviewed me, the Times called to ask if they could come and take a photograph of my son and me. I agreed, and the day before the election Zion and I hit the big time, supporting Eric Garcetti for mayor. That morning my phone started ringing early. I thought someone in my family had died, because relatives I usually see or speak with during the holidays or on my birthday were calling me. After learning that the district where I live, Mid-Wilshire, might be the one to determine the next mayor, I wrote a piece supporting Garcetti for the Huffington Postto drum up last-minute support. I also persuaded as many friends and family members as I could to go vote. It was expected that only a small percentage of voters would participate (it turned out to be only 19 percent), so I knew every vote would make a difference. By the end of election day, two of my neighbors acknowledged my efforts as the reason they took themselves to the polls to cast a vote for Garcetti. I just love that.
Eric Garcetti, Monique Ruffin in the Charlie Chaplin room at Campanile July 2012
I’m looking forward to the next four years. I’m going to engaged deeply in local politics and support the issues that matter most for me and my family. I have Daphne Brogdon to thank for this. If she had not invited me to the luncheon hosting a group of about twenty blogging moms and then mayoral candidate Garcetti, I would not have gotten to know him, and I would not have felt as inspired as I was on the day the reporter approached my son and me in the park. Who knows what’s possible when the stars align?
Monique Ruffin can be found at the Huffington Post and at Moms Can Change the World.
While I’m on my trip I have enlisted some of my favorite women to help me fill this space. Because of my involvement in the Mayor’s race I have felt more connected to my city and wanted to pick bloggers who also feel that connection. This blogger is Socal Mom Donna Schwartz Mills. She was one of the first bloggers I ever read and enjoyed. She also came to my Grilled Cheese for Garcetti at Campanile last year. She is also part of Momocrats. While Donna is politically involved and did support Garcetti for Mayor this post has NOTHING to do with local politics. I asked to reprint it here as it cracked me up. It’s awkward when a friend invites you to a party that you know is an excuse to make some money, but what if what they are selling you would NEVER buy… Take it away Donna.
We’d been talking about having a Girls Night Out for a while, so the Evite from my friend (she asks that I call her “Roxy”) was not a surprise.
The occasion was:
GET YOUR WILD ON!
A wild and wicked evening with friends!!! You are invited to bring a friend along- please let me know if you will be doing so! Drinks, Nibbles and entertainment provided. The Love Boutique will be here.
Gulp.
I guess this is the time I have to come out and confess that I am something of a prude. Oh, I was young and single once (in the 1970′s! and ’80′s), so I wasn’t always a Victorian.
And I’d been to one of these parties before: Thirty years ago, while still in college, my younger sister was a rep for one of the first companies selling sex toys and related products via the party plan. My mom volunteered to be her first hostess, and of course, I was invited. It was a command performance.
And it was weird. There was my kid sister, standing in the middle of our living room, passing around dildos and vibrators to my mom and her pals — all of whom were hooting and hollering and giggling over the wares. And over on the other side of the room, I sat with a couple of my friends, feeling creeped out about the whole thing.
“When you’re our age, you’ll understand,” laughed my mother’s friend Stella, who used to push me in my baby carriage. Shudder.
That experience was horrifying. But what’s more horrifying is that I am now 10 years older than my mom and her friends were back then. And I DO understand.
However, this is one area where I prefer to be private. It probably doesn’t help that I’m married to a Brit, who has very definite ideas about what is appropriate and what is not in polite company.
My girlfriends are not the type of people you’d describe as “polite company.” They’re fun. And this event had all the markings of an evening that would be fun…
…for everyone but Monica, the hapless young woman who came to Roxy’s suburban home to sell sex toys to a group of mommys, teachers and Brownie leaders.
Roxy is a terrific hostess. True to her word, there were plenty of yummy “nibbly bits” … and alcohol, which was something of a double-edged sword. I do the same thing when I’m hosting a sales party. Likkering up your guests loosens their purse strings. It also loosens them up in other ways, too.
The party got off to a raucous start when one of Roxy’s friends brought her a novelty store gift she’d purchased especially for the occasion: penis-shaped drinking straws, which were plopped into each of our cocktails, resulting in lots of cell phone snapshots and dirty giggling from the guests.
The phallus motif was carried on by Monica, who handed out pencils w/similarly shaped erasers.
For young Monica, it was all downhill from there, because my friends and I behaved much as my mom’s generation did in 1979. Monica estimated that her presentation would take about 40 minutes. An hour and a half later, she was begging us all to settle down because she wanted to go home.
Some of the merchandise was pretty benign: products you find every day at the supermarket: shaving cream, bubble bath, shower gel. Even some of the more intimate items are advertised routinely on television: like K-Y’s new line of lubricants — which was a hot item at last year’s Johnson & Johnson Camp Baby conference. (Monica tried to make a case for why her company’s products were superior.)
Some of the products were exactly the same as the ones my sister showed back in 1979 (notably, the Kama Sutra flavored powder with feather applicator – the packaging is even the same).
Then we got into “the good stuff’: The “Crystal Wand,” described by Monica as a “tool that penetrates your G-spot” (I dunno – the word “penetrate” sounded a bit inaccurate to me). BenWa balls. The “Vaginal Work Out Egg.” The Magic Sleeve. The Rabbit. The Dolphin. (All I can tell you is that I can never look at these innocent-seeming animals in the same way again.)
Throughout the presentation, Monica peppered us with little quiz questions for points (the one with the most would get a free prize). At the beginning, they were easy: 50 points if you’ve ever taken a bubble bath. 200 points if you ever lit a candle in the bathroom for your bath. 200 points if you ever made love in a body of water.
When we got to the toy part of the presentation, Monica told us to give ourselves 200 points for every toy we owned. This was the end of the quiz for me – I don’t have any.
But another of the guests announced that she collects them. This is the one who brought us the interesting cocktail straws. It turns out that she — and the two co-workers she brought to the party — works behind in the scenes in the porn industry. In fact, all three women once worked in front of the cameras.
Now, I’ve always heard that the San Fernando Valley is the pornography capital of the world, and I’ve been vaguely aware that people I meet through school and kids’ activities might be a part of that — but this was the first time I ever met anyone who was a part of it and talked about it. It turned out that these ladies were a lot more expert about the products than Monica was, and the conversation grew into a lively discussion of the merits of one item over another. These women had informed opinions — which I would listen to, if I was in the market for any of it.
But I’m not. I really studied the order form, trying to figure out what I was willing to drop some money on… and was relieved when Roxy told me she didn’t expect everyone to buy: this was just an opportunity for a Girls Night Out.
It had been fun. And not a bit creepy — aside from the fact that my mom’s friend Stella was right. Now, I understand.
Donna Schwartz Mills blogs at Socalmom.net and Momocrats
Hey I am heading out of trip right NOW. But, wanted to share a few seconds of supportive fame from the recent election.
Local TV in LA would rather do a story on a murder, any murder, no matter where then spend much time on our exhausting long Mayors race. They ask why people don’t vote? Sheesh. So, here is one of the FEW news reports on Mayor Elect Garcetti’s first news conference. Well, done Dave Lopez of channel 2. You can see me behind him. I’m the blonde with bands squinting in the sun. The lady with curly hair to my camera left the begining of the tape I met canvassing in South LA. Okay, I got to finish packing.
Oh yeah, the rest of the video is vision for LA, blah, blah, oh, why didn’t bring I sunglasses?
You might be thinking, Barbie you have a dream house in Malibu, you are unnaturally thin and curvy, big blue eyes and blonde hair without visible roots. 
You never get zits, what is the wanderlust? Well, apparently Barbie is looking for new digs. Malibu use to be more casual, now it’s full of super rich, and maybe David Geffen’s sea wall was the final straw for her. Good for you Barbie. My kids think you should move inland to Mid City. I’d love to have Barbie as a neighbor. I’d pop over while Ken is sunning.
The first stop on the Barbie tour is this Saturday, June 1 at the Grove in LA. If you had a dream house, where would you put it?
Okay, a little break from local politics, but still, alas, LA centered event. Pretty preg czar Rosie Pope is throwing a little mommy party and you are invited. Rosie has her own maternity line, and some nice clothes for those of us who will not be popping…anymore. She is a maternity concierge. What? Does she make you dinner reservations? Think she helps expectant moms get their game plan together.
She is the star of the Bravo reality series “Pregnant in Heels”. She has helped famous moms to be look chic and one of the ladies who goes to this event will be picked to get a fab make over.
So, here is the deal, if you are in Southern California next week RSVP to aaron@finnpartners.com for this event, tell them I sent you. Only five spots open and there will be a GIFT BAG.
That will get you into the event, meet Rosie, get her book, maybe get a make over. It’s sponsored by Scholarshare California’s 529 plan. The event is on May 29, get it, 5/29. Get it? At the Grove at 3rd and Fairfax in LA. It’s from 12 to 2. This is not a sponsored post, but they were nice to work with last year so I want to support them. Hey, in LA it’s not just about politics 
Best part
Valet parking will be provided for confirmed attendees.
The
My friend Eric Garcetti won. July 1st he will be the Mayor of the 2nd biggest city in the USA. I’ve been feeling on the verge of emotion for days, and had hoped to bawl last night… wine or lose. However, it didn’t work out that way.
Victory rolled in slowly
The large venue held a few of the people I’m use to seeing at his events and about 900 more I didn’t know. 
Mark was with me as were my sister Cecily, and her daughter Lily. They had made calls for the first time for Eric that day. My other sister is out of the country, but my nephew Charlie was there. He has gone to Eric’s valley office often after school to volunteer. He will probably be a senator one day and they said Lily worked the phones like a veteran Chicago Alderman.
One of my new friends through the campaign is Leonora Pitts. 
Star of TV and activist mom. There were times when she would show up to volunteer with her newborn- 2nd baby – strapped to her body. One time I showed up at Eric’s house to make calls and there Leonora was dialing for votes with her 9 day old baby sleeping next to her. That’s my kind of mom!
and our shoes
The party was large that I couldn’t get a good perch or see the TV screens. But, lots of people were tapping on their phones. ”Wendy is up by 200 votes.” someone said. Then Mark saw Gil Garcetti, Eric’s father, former DA, all around nice guy.
“Mark” Gill hugged Mark. We asked about what we had just heard. Gil said,
“We expected that. Those are early absentees. Greuel had a lot of ads up then, we didn’t so, we knew they would favor her.” he said talking about the different ebbs of flows of cash in the race.
“But, you saw the exit poll?” Gil refering to an earlier poll that day that showed Eric up. I didn’t say, “Kerry was up in exit polls too” but I didn’t say it.
Then I saw a man standing next to me smiling. I introduced myself, thinking he was Gil’s buddy. ”Hi, I’m Alex” he said, I wanted to get a picture with him.” Meaning Gil. Ah, a friend he hadn’t met yet, got it. I feel like one of my jobs in this race has been to connect people to the Garcetti folk. So, I said, “Gil, this guy really wants a picture with you.” He happily obliged.
Then a loud cheer went up. What?? Someone said, “Eric is up 2 thousand votes.” Cecily took Charlie and Lily home. It was getting late.
I was VERY honored that the campaign asked me to stand on the stage behind Eric. I had a special wrist band. I saw a bunch of the “VIP’s” rushing to the stage. I had to go up a staircase, across a big balcony, down a big staircase. The hierarchy of these things as I see them is
1) candidates family
2) big name supporters, local politicians, community leaders
3) diversity of community groups, different ethnicities, Vets, etc.
4) regular people who worked they hinds off. That’s my group.
People who didn’t have the wrist band were trying to get on. It was a bit like a life boat drama on the Titanic. As I rand up the stairs in my heels with my wrist band showing. I was right behind Councilmember Bernard Parks who is 9 feet tall. Crap. There guys my “Hey mom, I’m on TV” moment. I looked to my right and there was a friend of mine and her husband who are big supporters. Poor thing she is short. I said, “Get away from Parks” I didn’t want to be pushy, cause, hey it’s not about ME, however if I’m going to be part of history I’d like a glimpse. The crowd shifted enough so that I could move away from Parks and behind Councilman Paul Koretz. Yes, he is short. He is also a great councilman, btw, his office was very responsive to some issues we had when The Tar Pit was in his district. After a minute the music went up and out came Eric and his wife Amy.
my vantage point, Bernard Parks head
It was a sort of victory speech. Pretty much what you say when you when, thanking the opponent, but not a “We won!” line. Thus, I didn’t get to bawl as planned. I was just trying to get away from a tall councilmember’s shadow.
I did get a heartfelt hug from Amy who said she was looking forward to what I would write about the last days of the campaign– coming soon. She is such good people.
I found Mark and we spoke to Jan Perry. ME: “it’s going to go on for days?”
No, she said, “It will be over by 3am. Look” she pulled out her phone. “he is trending up, she is trending down.” Then, “I have to go soak my feet.” I agreed with the council woman and limped to the car.
So, sure doing the best for our community is important, but what did I wear? I chose the same dress I wore when I gave a luncheon for Eric last year for mom bloggers. That lunch helped him win support from some smart ladies who were with him till the end ( more later). I had asked for his mom Sukey to be at the lunch, knowing she would be a hit. She was.
When Campanile announced it’s closing I had emailed Eric and said something along the lines of, “well, I’m glad we could help you when could.” He wrote back in part, “Campanile has been the site of so many memories” Writing this, I’m finally, tearing up. Little did I know my husband would make more memories breaking out his grilled press by himself, at our home several more times to help Eric and make Grilled Cheese for Garcetti. For canvassers, to win over undecideds. I worked the room, he worked the press.
I wore a bracelet that Rex INSISTED I wear. You can see it hear on the outstretched arm over Bernard Parks shoulder ( his left, our right). An arm outstretched in hope of good times.
last sign on the right is mine
Okay, I have more to say about my deep involvement in the LA Mayor race, but right now it’s less than an hour till polls close and I can’t get thoughts together. We first did something to help Eric Garcetti become mayor of LA in the summer of ’11.
Tonight I will stand behind him on stage at the celebration party. I hope it’s a victory party, but for me it will be a celebration no matter because I have experienced so much. Met so many great people.
Fingers Crossed.